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Bur's cover of "Sweet Home Battersea Power Station" nominated for a Brit award


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Bur at the Brits or Blur on Mars?
Bur's cover of 'Sweet Home Battersea Power Station' nominated for a Brit award
Danger2Mice re-samples Bur's cover of Sweet Home Battersea Power Station'
Hungarian Toxic Red Sludge - what is it exactly ?'
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If nothing else Dr Colin Pilcher has proved that not only are there giant space-probe eating spiders on Mars, but also that they don't care that much for Brit-Pop. Next time we should send the Gallagher brothers over...

Actually it's all because of the WEEE Directive, plus of course the End of Life Directive, and now thanks to those pesky Beurocrats someone will have to go over there and package up the poor old Beagle (dog-eared old fag-ends and all) and recycle it in a socially responsible manner rather than fly-tipping chico-grammes of hexavalent chromium down the Martian equivalent of the Grand Canyon.

Anyway back to more important matters, just where are those Weapons of Mass Destruction? Well according to a whistleblower (GCHQ ? - couldn't possibly comment, Official Secrets Act and all that old girl is not the short answer) a well known member of a prominent Greek Shipping family has been responsible for transporting industrial grade WMD's out from the UK for quite a while. Most of them have admittedly been covered-up by government legislation, but some have been spotted out in the open. Apparently these J-bombs (as they are known to the cognocetti) come in 3 main payloads.

  1. The Judy - rather old and tired UK technology, part of an ITV expose some years ago, low grade, no real collateral damage, although some fall-out
  2. The Jordan - recently field tested in the Australian Outback, and subject to an enquiry by Lord Brockett, high payload and form factor
  3. The Janet - apparently one was cited only weeks ago, in the USA, just below the Timberline, apparently full of sound and fury signifying nothing - and topped off with a dinky little yellow-cake.

Blah blah blah WMD Gilligan Hutton Dyke, when are we gonna get some real news, such as how just in the Darkness all cats are gray, or maybe something interesting about Bur at the Brits, OK OK so here's the inside story on that one.

Bur was recently surfing the Internet (as one does) when he came across a parody music site. So what you say, the Internet is one gigantic parody, yes but this site parodied Bur's favourite 70's Southern Rock Band - Lynyrd Skynyrd.

Quick as a flash Bur penned (or is that moused ?) his version of Sweet Home Alabama - except it is called Sweet Home Battersea Power Station, so please turn your amp upto 11 and yowl at will...


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Bur's cover of 'Sweet Home Battersea Power Station' nominated for a Brit award


Sweet Home Battersea Power Station

Routemaster 137 wheels keep on turning
carry me homewards to ma kin
singing songs about coal gasification
I miss Battersea Power Station once again, and I think its sad

Well I heard Mrs Thatcher talk about her
well I heard old Tony put her down
well I hope John Prescott will remember
Soil Guidance Values mean we don't need them politicians around anyhow

Sweet Home Battersea Power Station
where the blackbirds are so blue
spent oxide and asbestos
might be lying there next to you

Wandsworth Council says the site ain't contaminated, kelly, icrcl,dutch list
because a receptor just ain't there
and anyway once it's been redeveloped
who cares if the squirrels have got green hair

Lord Hutton would probably have concluded
them gypsy tree-rats should not be there
as we are still pre-accession
and foreigners taking acorns out of the mouths of locals, why that just ain't fair

Sweet home Battersea Power Station
where the flying pigs are so pink
the pit bull terriers are called billy
cos the're blue and cause a 'monical stink


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Danger2Mice re-samples Bur's cover of Sweet Home Battersea Power Station


Some breaking news has just danced in - 'Danger2Mice' that well known Burmese rapper (formerly the artist known as Zak) has just sampled (as per CLEA government guidlines) Bur's song 'Sweet Home Battersea Power Station' (on what was known as the Blue Billy album) and re-released it on the Prussian label.

Apparently not only was government guidance needed on the lyrics (which were judged to be toxicological), but horror of horrors they were found to be inexact in their totality, hence the need for re-sampling!

In depth historical review (namely reading the sleeve notes of Pink Floyd's 'Animals') revealed that Battersea Power Station was just that - a Battered old Power Station with tidal access to the Sea. Apparently in the old days if one was in the market for a dose of the old smelling salts, the place to go for your fix of Coal Gasification products (such as performance enhancing designer phenols) was north of the river dahn the Kings Road at Sands End.

When I passed this news onto Bur his only response was to ask me why I didn't FAQ off. On being informed that this for me was a frequently asked question, he did his best Sex Pistols impersonation by firstly hissing at me, and then spitting in my face.

Sweet Home Battersea Power Station (re-sampled)

Bendy buses keep on burning
carrying me homewards to ma kin
singing songs about industrial icon desecration
I miss Routemasters and Battersea Power Station once again, and I think its sad

Well I heard Mrs Thatcher talk about her
well I heard old Tony put her down
well I hope John Prescott will remember
Soil Guidance Values mean we don't need them toxicologists around anyhow

Sweet Home Battersea Power Station
where the flying pigs are so pink
PCB's and asbestos
might be closer to you than you think

Wandsworth Council says the site ain't contaminated, kelly, icrcl,dutch list
because a receptor just ain't there
and anyway once it's been redeveloped
who cares if the squirrels have got green hair

Lord Hutton would probably have concluded
them brownfields tree-rats should not be there
as the EU's still pre-accession
sciurus vulgaris taking acorns out of the mouths of locals, why that just ain't fair

Sweet Home Battersea Power Station
where the flying pigs are so pink
PCB's and asbestos
might be closer to you than you think

Apparently the reason Bur was hacked off about his version of Sweet Home Battersea Power being re-sampled was that he had originally planned to call the song Parklife.


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Hungarian Toxic Red Sludge - what is it exactly ?


Well if you were teetotal, which for Hungarians is almost as hard as being a vegetarian, you would say it was the "Vorosbor" known otherwise as Bulls Blood the famous red wine from the town of Eger. No doubt when history is rewritten in the next century (when the sleeping giant known as Africa will finally wake up) it will relate that the Masai introduced it to Europe when a depressed Lucy went walkabout from Afar....

But to answer your question the venerable BBC has thoughfully provided a guide to this question. Sadly it has a few errors as it says that ...

The sludge contains a mix of metal oxides, which are by-products from the early stage of aluminium production, where as part of the process, bauxite, the raw material, is taken out of the ground and washed with sodium hydroxide. Well for a start actually the bauxite is digested at high temperature rather than washed and this procedure has a proper name The Bayer Process

The waste products of this process according to the BBC consist of a variety of compounds including aluminium oxide, silicon oxide calcium oxide, titanium dioxide and sodium oxide now that is a pretty potent sounding mix of stuff except it is not actually true as it actually consists of silicon dioxide (beach sand) calcium hydroxide (quick lime) and sodium hydroxide (caustic soda).


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